the ant wars

We have ants. 
BAD.
Really bad.

Well, probably not that bad but when I keep finding them in the house I consider it an infestation.

Here is a time line of our conflict:

May 22: Ants spotted in the dog food.  All dog food is thrown away.  The ant trails are sprayed.  The bowls and floor are scrubbed.  At this point I am not too concerned- this happened with the cat food in our first apartment.  Once everything was cleaned the ants never returned.
June 6:  A few ants begin reappearing in/around front door area.
June 7: Front porch is saturated with Raid Ant and Roach killer.
June 12: Hubs cleans out my car.  He throws all remnants of cereal, french fries, chips, and other miscellaneous crumbs into yard.
June 13: Mega ant trails are spotted.  I yell at Hubs for giving the ants a reason to stick around.  I declare war on the ants and spray another entire can of Raid on their trails. 
June 15: No sign of the ants.  I declare V.I.C.T.O.R.Y.  Bugs… don’t mess with me!
June 23: Stragglers begin to appear.  I liken it to people coming out after a nuclear meltdown.  They were staggering and looked lost.  I stomped on them- put them out of their misery.
June 26: The ants reappear.  I SCREAM!! Then sweep them away.  I will not be beat.
June 27: A dead June bug is spotted on the front porch.  I consider it collateral damage- a casualty of the war with the ants.  Later in the day, about a million ants begin carrying off the dead bug.  I spray half a bottle of Wasp Killer on the ants (by this point I have run out of ant killer) and drown the ants.
June 28: Hubs wakes up to ants in the sink and on the window sill.  They have also swarmed a bottle of Children’s Tylenol (actually- Target brand version because I am too cheap for the real stuff and it was all recalled anyway).  He joins the war, finds a bottle of ant killer in the garage (apparently it was there yesterday and I didn’t know it), and doused the outside of the house under the window and doors. 
While I am sweeping the family room, I move the furniture and find Cheeze-Its under the couch.  I blame the kids for our ant infestation and make a new rule- No food or drink outside the kitchen.
I decide the whole house needs to be scrubbed with Bleach and Amonia.  Just kidding- I know what happens when you mix those things.  Instead I get in my car and head to Wal-Mart for more ant killer.
The boys and I go on a “nature walk” in the yard looking for the colony.  We spray bug killer in every possible ant hole.

During lunch, Hubs asked if it was time to call the Orkin Man.  I am cheap so I don’t want to but if the ants keep coming back it will be time to call in reinforcements. 

My questions today:  How much is too much?  When do you say “No more bugs!” and call in the professionals?  Do you have a non-chemical way of keeping the ants at bay?  Who is the bug slayer in your house?  Am I crazy??

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2 Comments

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2 responses to “the ant wars

  1. Lisa Muehlbauer

    Call in the professionals…..over the counter bug killer is expensive…get it done and over with. Ants suck.

  2. Kelly Schrieber

    You should try the bait version of ant killer – the spray only kills the ants you see, the bait gets carried back to the colony and kills them at the source. I use Grant’s, thought it worked better than the stuff that Orkin and Terminix uses. Good luck!

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